Friday, November 6, 2009

The Un-doing

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Cor. 12:9-11

"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." John 15:5

As many people do, I have been guilty for a large portion of my life of falling into the trap of self-pity and condemnation over not measuring up to some standard I give myself when it comes to my responsiblities of life...mainly as a wife and mom. I beat myself up daily to the point of near self-destruction sometimes. And lately, it seems my weaknesses have become more and more prevalent. Like glaring in my face...all the time! It's ugly and I feel I am fighting a fierce battle that has come against me in this area. Fierce! But here's the deal! I'm DONE! Done fighting in my flesh, done striving! Done thinking I can figure it all out! Done trying harder! But did I say I'm done fighting? No! But I'm not fighting alone. I'm letting God in to fight for me!

The verses above has been my life-source the past few weeks. And there have been some small victories already over my own fleshly responses due to applying these verses to those lowest, weakest moments. For an example, when I have clearly messed up in how I talk to my kids, my husband, or lacked faith once again over our finances, and when the word "failure" wants to haunt me and enter my mind over and over, I answer back "His grace is sufficient". "Because of Christ in me, when I am weak, then I am strong" ."For His power is made perfect in my weakness". That is such a quandry to many of us. How is that true? How does that work? The way we become stronger, is recognizing our weaknesses, then yielding our weaknesses to Him...and I mean all of them. What prevents us from doing that? Our friend Pride. Who likes to admit that they can't do something on their own. Who? To hand them over minute by minute, day by day, until His power has become a reality in our lives is not an easy task, but the Word says it is necessary to find that abundant life He has promised.

I have felt the Lord impressing on me to literally let some things that I have tried to be in control of fall apart, so that I can see clearly where I have no power in my own strength. Then I can clearly give Christ the power where power is due when those things come back into order. Because I know it isn't me doing it. It's been tough. As the devil tries to throw the failure card at me over and over. I mean, it is true that apart from Him I can do nothing. But praise God that I don't have to depend on myself to do anything. PRAISE GOD!!

But where I come in is where I WILLINGLY AND HUMBLY let Christ be in control of me in every aspect of my life. Not just during my quiet time, or when I send a prayer up here and there. Or when things are going great around me. But in EVERY moment of my day. Talking with Him all the time, fellowshipping with Him as I do dishes, or cook dinner...yielding to His instruction or guidance when I am about to lose my temper with my kids or have a bad thought that will take me on a slippery slope. My flesh wants to control me in all of these things and we know where that leads. Romans 7:714-25 explains it all. But He didn't die on the cross so I can stay there, Amen?
So it's time to let the cross and it's power take over in everything. Everything! When He said apart from me, we can do nothing, He meant it! I think we'd be amazed at what He can do through us if we just give Him the reins and let His power rest on us the way He intended it. I'm sure I'm in for a long road ahead with this un-doing, but I can't wait to see what God can do if I'd just get my flesh out of the way and let Him take over 100%.

Lord, I pray for your consuming fire to burn away all the fleshly passions and desires that have run my life. Your love is enough for me! You are enough for all of me! May the life I live reflect who You are, and who You say I am in Christ!

1 comment:

A Warrior's Heart said...

I think this is your best post yet. Love it and love you.